One word; one event; can cause so much distress. It leaves a hole in your heart. It leaves your blood to rise and crash like waves in a hurricane. It leaves your mind wondering, doubting, hating, cherishing, making sense, and confused about so much in life. These feelings are all in an adult’s world. We, as adults, should be able to handle the pains, sorrows, and sadness much better than a child. But what about children? How do they handle it?
I remember when I was around my 20’s when my grandmother passed away. She and I were so close. I felt exactly as I had mentioned above. I even tried talking to a professional when it happened. Not only did I lose my grandmother, but I also experienced my grandfather, my aunt, my uncle, and my parents dog had passed away around the same time, years later. Needless to say, I do not handle death well. But, when I would go to my sessions and talk, I realized it wasn’t doing anything to help me. I stopped going. Everyone asked me why…I realized it was just something I had to figure out on my own. I had to make sense of it. Some people tend to figure things out better on their own. I am one of those.
But what about those who are so lost in those dark feelings, and do not know how to come back from it? How could anyone help them find peace? If it was difficult for me to find peace until years later, I couldn’t imagine a young child having to deal with those confusing feelings of losing someone they loved or even a parent by themselves. They would feel so alone. People will say very encouraging words to them, but it will not mean anything until that person or child really understands the concept of death, and that the person who passed on, really is in a better place. Some people will take less time to heal, while others may need to go to a dark place to find some peace eventually. Some people may never find that light.
Just remember, we all need family and friends around us to help us heal and find peace through these dark times. As much as someone says they need space to be alone, honor that, yet still be really close so they do not lose the battle to heal. Someone absolutely loved when I made this comment, and so I shall spread these words to everyone who needs to hear them…”Through family and friends, the mind and heart will heal.”
Leave a Reply